How to Learn Unlearning?

“Not enough storage space on the device.” “Cannot install the application. Free up space and try again.” “Internal memory almost full. Some functions may work more slowly.” Almost all of us have seen messages like these at some point on the screen of our computer, phone, or console. Downloading new content - apps, games, software - requires finding free space on the drive and organizing older files. Very often it is only in moments like these that we realize the equipment we use every day is not a “bottomless well” and, besides its capabilities, also has limitations that prevent it from working efficiently.

With no other option, we start cleaning up: deleting useless screenshots, removing the excess of stored “selfies,” uninstalling programs and apps whose names we no longer recognize or even know how to pronounce, getting rid of outdated files covered in digital dust, and, with a heavy heart, deleting games that we have already completed more than once but kept on the drive out of sentiment, telling ourselves for years that “I’ll definitely play this again someday.” The situation becomes especially frustrating when the device refuses to install a new system update because it is still running on a version from several years ago - technically functional, but increasingly slow, sluggish, and temperamental. That is when it dawns on us that the problem is not the new software, but the fact that the device can no longer cooperate with old settings. And that to work faster, more smoothly, and more intuitively, it first must get rid of what is slowing it down.

Interestingly, we rarely question the point of such updates (even though we constantly complain about how often they appear) - we simply click “accept,” “continue,” or “install,” because we know it is necessary if we want our phone or computer to keep up with reality at all. And yet in life we do exactly the opposite: we hold on to beliefs, habits, and mental patterns that function like old programs - once useful, now incompatible with new challenges and realities. We accumulate “mental files” that only take up space, block updates, and slow down the operation of the entire “system”.

And then we are surprised that the world is speeding up while we feel like an old phone model that can no longer even be charged. Just as our devices need free space to run smoothly, our minds also need room to grow. Unlearning is not a failure or a surrender, but a form of updating - without which it is impossible to function in a world that is constantly downloading ever newer versions of itself. 

Unlearning as One of the Competencies of the Future

Today’s reality forces us not only to learn, but also to consciously delete data that no longer serves us and sometimes simply gets in the way. Unlearning is becoming one of the most important competencies of the 21st century, even though almost no one — nomen omen — teaches us how to do it at school, at university, or at work. While it is easy to understand that we need to acquire new skills, it is much harder to admit that we also need to abandon old patterns and outdated bodies of knowledge. It often feels like wasting previously invested effort, giving up personal experience, or simply admitting we were wrong, even though in a dynamic world this is a natural step forward and a consequence of the constant multiplication of data, information, and stimuli. Updating our beliefs is not a sign of inconsistency, but of maturity — a signal that we notice change and are both able and willing to adapt to it. Without this, we begin to live in a cognitive past, much like companies that missed technological revolutions and disappeared from the market because they were unable to replace their old habits with new ones.

Today’s world demands fluidity, flexibility, and the courage to redefine oneself. It is no coincidence that the World Economic Forumlists adaptability and lifelong learning among the most important competencies of the future — but equally important, though less spectacular, is removing from our minds what no longer works. Unlearning does not mean losing knowledge; it means removing mental barriers that block further development. Sometimes this involves letting go of former priorities, sometimes changing behaviors, and sometimes making only small adjustments in the way we think. Without this, however, we remain stuck, even if we are learning intensively. After all, it is possible to accumulate more and more courses and competencies and remain trapped in the same old way of seeing the world. In such cases, new data does not translate into new thinking.

Why Is It So Hard to “Free Up Disk Space”?

The difficulty lies in the fact that people are emotionally attached to their beliefs, because it is precisely these beliefs that our identity is built from - and identity is not something we change as easily as an app on a phone. Every new challenge and every change collide with our “inner conservative,” whispering: “why touch it if it’s worked for years?” It’s a bit like patching up household problems: “this can be glued,” “this can be tightened,” “this can be blocked”— “it’ll hold for now.” Of course, it will - until the archaic washing machine floods half the apartment, the wobbly chair collapses under our weight, or the “prehistoric” extension cord blows the fuses in the entire building. Change is often difficult not because it is complex, but because it forces us to question what we have been relying on. Added to this is the fear of the unknown, which makes us prefer repeating old patterns rather than stepping into territory that feels unfamiliar and unexplored.

Meanwhile, the contemporary world leaves us no real choice. When technology, the economy, and culture change like a kaleidoscope, clinging to old beliefs becomes like trying to keep your balance on a moving platform. It is precisely a flexible approach to one’s own beliefs that determines who will continue to grow and move forward, and who will freeze mid-stride, trying to regain balance on that shifting surface. This does not mean, of course, that all old values should be thrown away - quite the opposite. What is needed is the ability to distinguish what is fundamental from what has become useless and outdated. But to do that, we must first come to terms with the fact that not everything we have “installed” in our system is meant to stay there forever. 

Unlearning Is Just as Important as Learning 

Although we intuitively feel that the hardest part of personal development is acquiring new skills, cognitive psychology has been showing something quite different for years: our greatest enemy is not what we do not know, but what we think we know. A brain that has evolved to conserve energy prefers to rely on well-worn patterns rather than generate new neural connections. The sunk cost effect makes us defend past choices not because they are good, but because we have invested time, energy, and emotions in them. The anchoring effect, in turn, causes the first piece of information we receive to become an “anchor” we struggle to detach from and move beyond. These mechanisms were once useful, allowing us to make quick decisions, but today - in a dynamic and unpredictable world — they can easily lead us astray. Why? Because when data changes faster than our beliefs, we end up in a cognitive dead end.

Psychologists say that unlearning is, in fact, “an act of courage against one’s own brain,” because it requires the conscious dismantling of what feels intuitive. Research shows that people are far more likely to add than to subtract. A team from the University of Virginia found that in problem-solving situations as many as 78% of people instinctively choose to add new elements rather than remove unnecessary ones — even when subtraction would be faster and more effective. The brain simply loves “more”: more data, more rules, more explanations. Yet effective thinking in the 21st century depends on the ability to consciously subtract — to let go of what is unnecessary in order to make space for something new. That is why learning alone is no longer enough. Without unlearning, we begin to resemble an overfilled hard drive: it still works, but increasingly slowly, throws up more and more errors, disrupts the system’s functioning, and resists every new intervention. 

Not Only Data, But Habits Worth Archiving

Unlearning, contrary to appearances, does not concern knowledge alone, but above all the mental habits that shape how we look at the world every day. They determine which information we consider important, how we interpret social situations, which arguments we are willing to hear out and which we reject outright. Psychologists compare these habits to glasses we wear for years - so long that we eventually forget we even have them on. And yet, if we do not take them off, even for a moment, we will never see what the world looks like without them. Unlearning is therefore the act of removing those glasses, and it is one of the more demanding processes for the brain, because it involves a temporary loss of stability. We have to recreate meaning, order and a way of interpreting reality - and that comes at a cost, both emotional and cognitive.

Neurobiology shows, however, that the brain is remarkably plastic: it can reorganize itself if we give it a signal that the current pattern no longer works. Research on neuroplasticity clearly indicates that “subtracting” old patterns activates the same brain regions responsible for learning, but in reverse - rather than building new neural pathways, it quiets and weakens the redundant ones. Without unlearning, we interpret new situations using old categories. That is why innovation experts often say that the greatest barrier is not a lack of knowledge, but an excess of certainty. The conviction that “we already know how things are” blocks change more effectively than ignorance ever could. 

Future Means Unlearning the Past 

The job market is changing today at a pace that is hard to keep up with. Reports by the OECD and the World Economic Forum regularly predict that in the coming years automation will affect not dozens, but hundreds of professions, and some estimates suggest that as much as 40% of the tasks currently performed by humans may be transferred to machines and artificial intelligence. In such circumstances, simply learning new skills is no longer enough — it becomes necessary to unlearn old procedures, ways of thinking, and methods of work that were designed for eras of stability rather than chaos. Examples from big business show that failure to adapt to change can bury even giants. Kodak was unable to unlearn thinking in terms of traditional photography and failed to meet the challenges of digitalization. Nokia could not abandon its classic approach to mobile phones and missed the moment when the world began to think of smartphones as mini computers. In both cases, it was not learning that failed, but precisely unlearning.

Research from the LinkedIn Workforce Learning Report shows that adaptability has been one of the most sought-after soft skills in the world for several years. And adaptation is not only about downloading new updates — it is also about removing those that have become incompatible. Companies increasingly prefer people who are able to give up old tools, inefficient communication models, or management methods that have long since stopped working. In the age of AI this is especially evident: when algorithms handle what is schematic, repetitive, and predictable for us, real value lies in the ability to look at problems from a new perspective — and that requires abandoning the old one. This is why unlearning is becoming a condition for economic survival and, at the same time, a way to avoid becoming a hostage to technology.

Education Is Not Only About Learning 

In education, unlearning may be even more important, because it is precisely schools and education systems that for years prepared us for a world that is now changing dynamically. We were taught to repeat patterns, think linearly, and reproduce knowledge from memory, rather than to question, reassess, or dismantle existing beliefs. Meanwhile, contemporary research on future skills shows that it is precisely a flexible approach to knowledge that will determine professional and personal success. As technology develops, the ability to critically reset what we know becomes increasingly valuable — not merely the accumulation of ever larger amounts of information. Today’s students will change professions many times, and their work will be based on redefining problems rather than executing previously known solutions.

Educational systems in Finland, Singapore, and Estonia already recognize this shift, which is why they introduce critical thinking, complex problem solving, and learning from mistakes as standard elements of schooling. This is an attempt to teach young people not only how to consume knowledge, but how to process it and discard what is no longer relevant. At the same time, the importance of lifelong learning is growing — but in a new, more demanding form: not just training courses, but continuous reconstruction of mental models. In a world where Google answers questions faster than a teacher, and ChatGPT solves tasks in seconds, the key human advantage lies in interpretation, empathy, flexibility, and the ability to change perspective. That is why unlearning is becoming not merely an addition, but a central pillar of the education of the future — because without the ability to let go of what is unnecessary, it is impossible to make room for skills that will truly matter in the years ahead.

Resistance – the First Obstacle on the Path to Change

However, even the best education systems and the most progressive strategies cannot eliminate one factor: the human being, who by nature dislikes tampering with what is familiar. That is why unlearning does not begin with knowledge, but with confronting resistance, which appears the moment something disrupts our status quo. Resistance to change is entirely natural — it is not a character flaw, but a biological and psychological defense mechanism that has helped humans survive for thousands of years. The brain does not like uncertainty, because uncertainty means risk, and risk is synonymous with potential threat. That is why every change, even the most desirable one, initially triggers something like an internal alarm: “Warning! I don’t know this! Don’t touch it!”. This is well described by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’s model of change, best known in the context of grief, but equally accurate when applied to any transformation process: first comes shock, then denial, bargaining, anger, and only later acceptance. And although this sequence may look different for each person, one thing remains constant: resistance is the first signal that the brain is trying to preserve the existing state.

In psychology, it is often said that people are not afraid of change itself, but of the loss of control associated with it. Moving from resistance to acceptance requires understanding that discomfort is part of the process, not a sign that we are doing something wrong. In practice, it resembles emotional stretching — it hurts a little, but that is precisely what increases our range of motion. According to psychology, the first step toward acceptance is the “normalization of resistance”: not fighting it but treating it as information that we are entering a zone of growth. When change begins to make sense, motivation rises and fear diminishes. Only then does space open for genuine acceptance — not as passive resignation, but as a conscious shift of the mental lever. It is a path that leads from chaos to a sense of agency and allows us to see change not as a threat, but as a new chapter.

From Micro to Macro Unlearning 

Moving from resistance to acceptance is a process that can be consciously supported. One of the most effective strategies is the so-called method of “micro-unlearning” — instead of trying to change everything at once, we start with small, controlled steps that help the brain acclimate to a new reality. This approach is far more effective than the revolutionary “from tomorrow I change everything,” because it bypasses the biological alarm system that activates in response to sudden change. Another strategy is changing the context — research shows that people find it easier to unlearn old habits not in the environment where they were formed, but in a new one. This is why after a trip, a vacation, or a job change, it often becomes easier to adopt new attitudes.

It is also helpful to consciously create cognitive pauses — moments in which we observe our own patterns instead of operating on autopilot. Another effective method is building emotional resilience through exposure to discomfort — rather than avoiding it, we practice tolerating it. This is why people who engage in extreme sports, martial arts, or cold-water immersion often say they cope better with life changes — their brains regularly experience controlled stress that teaches flexibility. Equally important is narrative perspective: if we see change as a threat, we will defend ourselves against it, but if we see it as an opportunity, we begin to treat it as an investment in our future self.

How To Learn Unlearning? 

Introducing unlearning into everyday life does not require a life revolution, but rather attentiveness, consistency, and a willingness to question our own automatisms. What tools and strategies can support this process? 

• Journaling: One of the simplest and at the same time most effective tools is keeping a reflection journal. It allows us to observe our own patterns from a safe distance. When we write down our thoughts, decisions, or emotions, it becomes easier to notice recurring themes, old mechanisms, and faulty assumptions that otherwise slip past our awareness. This is where the process of unlearning truly begins: in the conscious recognition of what no longer serves us.
• „Behavioral experiments”: Known from cognitive-behavioral therapy, these involve small attempts to challenge our own beliefs — for example, if we believe that “everything has to be perfect,” the experiment may involve completing a task at 80% and observing what happens. In most cases, it turns out that the world does not collapse and our fears were unfounded.
• “Micro-resets”: Short, intentional breaks and deviations from routine that allow us to look at reality from a slightly different angle. This might mean changing your route to work, having breakfast in a different place than usual, shopping in a store you previously avoided, or introducing a new color into your everyday wardrobe. Such small disruptions of routine open the brain to alternatives and show that “it can be done differently”.
• Building an environment that supports flexibility: One of the key strategies is surrounding ourselves with people who think differently than we do — not only in terms of views, but also ways of functioning, experiences, or professions. Surprisingly, contact with diversity disarms our automatic patterns and opens cognitive doors that remain closed in hermetic environments.
• Information management: Selecting sources, reducing noise, consciously filtering data instead of scrolling endlessly. In an age of information overload, unlearning also means letting go of the illusion that “I have to know everything”.
• “Mental training” and the method of micro-shifts: Thanks to neuroplasticity, the brain likes new patterns but needs to practice them regularly, which is why it is worth introducing “mental training” — learning new skills unrelated to work, temporarily abandoning favorite habits, or exposing ourselves to new environments. Even small changes — such as eating differently than usual, reading different literary genres, or choosing a random podcast — can create micro-shifts in mental structures.
• Conscious resignation from certain tasks, roles, and beliefs: The ability to say “no,” to redirect priorities, and to let go of perfectionism.

Research shows that the brain learns best when it is slightly challenged but not overwhelmed; the same applies to unlearning — it requires stepping beyond comfort but not throwing oneself into chaos. That is why the daily practice of unlearning is more a series of small modifications than heroic and abrupt upheavals. It is a process that becomes natural over time. At a certain point, we begin to treat unlearning as a daily “taking off of a mental backpack” that we carried out of habit and that only slowed us down. It is worth asking yourself one simple but uncomfortable question: what is the one thing I am ready to uninstall from my mind today? Sometimes a small change is enough to trigger an entire process of updating our thinking. It is a small step that can change the direction in which we move every day.

We Can Update Our “Database” Only Ourselves

Although unlearning is one of the key competencies today, it would be a serious mistake to treat it as more important than learning itself. If we focus exclusively on deleting, deconstructing, and questioning, we can easily fall into the trap of permanent deconstruction, where nothing has time to take root and we become hostages to constant change. Unlearning without learning resembles a renovation after which no furniture is brought in - there is more space, but it is unclear what it is actually for. On the other hand, learning without unlearning leads to system overload and the accumulation of outdated data. That is why balance is crucial: first we need curiosity to explore, experiment, and try new things, and only then the courage to admit that not everything we have learned still makes sense. In practice, this is a rhythm like breathing - inhaling new information and experiences, exhaling what is no longer useful. Unlearning is not a competitor to learning, but it’s quiet ally. Only when we learn to use both processes simultaneously do we stand a real chance of keeping up with reality instead of merely chasing its shadow.

Unlearning is not easy, because - unlike our phones and computers - no one will display a message saying, “Not enough space in your mind. Delete old files to continue.” We must decide for ourselves what to keep, what to update, and what to uninstall for good. No algorithm, no system, and no automatic memory-optimizing function will do it for us. Compared to technology, however, we have one crucial advantage: we do not have to replace ourselves with a newer model - it is enough to install updates regularly, and we can successfully work on the same “operating system” for an entire lifetime.